5 Signs You’re Ready to Dive Back into the Dating Pool

With summer right around the corner, you may be excited at the thought of swimming again. For many, this could be interpreted in the literal sense of going to the beach, but for others this may mean a metaphorical dating pool.

If you’re considering dipping your toes back in but you aren’t quite sure if you’re ready to start making a splash, you’re not alone. In fact, it’s a common dilemma — especially after a significant breakup or a prolonged period of being single.

Before you take the plunge, self-help dating author Brianna McCabe shares that it’s critical to assess your emotional readiness by evaluating these five signs:

1. You’ve found closure from past relationships.

Closure doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ve forgotten about your ex or that you don’t feel any lingering emotions, but instead it means that you’ve embraced this overarching concept of acceptance that the relationship has come to an end. With that sense of peace, you are able to relinquish any anchoring feelings of unresolved resentment, pain, sadness, and anger and have instead freed up that space in your heart to be able to invest into new relationships.

2. You’re okay with being alone.

Before you can truly connect with others, it’s important that you can connect with yourself (and have found comfort in doing so, too). Enjoying your own company, pursuing your own interests, and identifying what truly makes you, well, you, is essential to the creation of your own emotional independence. With this solidified, you can then enter new relationships from a place of strength, confidence, and security, as opposed to neediness and desperation.

3. You’ve established a clear vision of what you want — and what you don’t want.

Think about it: how can you start dating if you haven’t clearly identified what it is that you value in a partner? Without clear intentions, you may find yourself in a whirlpool of half-baked connections. However, if you’ve taken the time to reflect on your past experiences and have also defined what it is that you’re looking for, this will guide you in making better choices in prospective partners. By also having concrete deal-breakers and boundaries through the clarification of your values and priorities, it will ensure that you’re seeking relationships that align with your needs and standards — all with the goal of securing a fulfilling, healthy relationship.

4. You’ve worked on (and bettered) yourself.

Periods of singleness can serve as opportunities for personal growth and development. Whether this has been achieved through therapy, self-reflection, a pursuit of passions, or healthy routines, you’re likely in a mentally- and emotionally-elevated mindset to start dating again. Self-awareness can not only enhance the relationship with yourself, but it can enhance the relationships that you have with others.

5. You feel excited to start dating again.

So what if you only feel safe splashing around in the shallow end of the pool for now? Or maybe you feel like doing a few laps in the deep end, but feel more comfortable with your floaties. That is perfectly okay (and can even be expected). The fact that you even want to immerse yourself in the first place is a sign that you’re ready to meet new people and explore potential connections. 

Always remember: have fun, be safe, and know that this is a sport that you can indulge in at your own pace and leisure. 

TO LEARN MORE ABOUT DATING, SELF-LOVE, AND RELATIONSHIP RED FLAGS, GRAB A COPY OF BRIANNA MCCABE’S SELF-HELP BOOK, THE RED FLAGS I'VE (REPEATEDLY) IGNORED.